It can be frustrating when you find yourself asking: “why does my husband think he does nothing wrong?” Being in a marriage (or relationship) with someone who cannot admit when they are wrong is toxic. As a result, you are unable to express your feelings with honesty. You might even feel as though you do not matter in your relationship.
Why Does My Husband Think He Does No Wrong?
Before you start thinking about ways to address the problem, it is important to understand first why someone would think that they can do no wrong. As it turns out, there are several reasons why this would happen.
First off, your husband might have a narcissistic personality. A narcissist person is someone who thinks highly of himself. As a result, they firmly believe that they are always right.
Another personality-based reason why your husband might think he does no wrong is if he is a perfectionist. His desire for perfection results in that never-wrong personality. He finds it difficult to admit that he is wrong because he is so fixated on being perfect and he cannot embrace his shortcomings.
A lot of husbands also use this persona as a defense mechanism. They do not want to deal with their insecurities and vulnerabilities, so they build up a wall in order to prevent them from facing up to their mistakes.
Finally, it could be that your husband is dealing with low self-esteem. Individuals who have low self-esteem tend to overcompensate for it by thinking that they’re right in everything they do in order to hide their flaws or weaknesses.
My Husband Thinks He Does Nothing Wrong: How to Deal with it
As you can see, there are plenty of reasons why your husband might think he does nothing wrong. The next step is to address this problem so that it won’t end up sabotaging your marriage.
Don’t Blame Yourself
First off, stop thinking that it is your fault. You have to understand that it is a personality problem in your husband and there is nothing wrong with you. You are doing the best that you can to deal with the situation, but the only fix is in him.
You can take comfort with the fact that he is dealing with insecurities. While it is important that you get help for his behavior, you must begin by letting go of the notion that you are to blame for the situation.
Stand Up Against the Abuse
You might have made peace with the fact that your husband is exhibiting this type of behavior because of deep-seated psychological issues or insecurities. However, this is still no excuse for him to treat you poorly or behave the way he does.
Acknowledge that this is abusive behavior and stand up to it. You should never tolerate such behavior in your marriage, especially if you are to thrive as a healthy married couple. Let him know that your opinion matters and that he needs to value it as much as his own.
Communicate with Him
One of the best ways to overcome abuse in a marriage is to communicate. Maintaining open and honest communication is one of the best tools for a successful relationship, especially a marriage.
When you communicate issues with your husband, do so respectfully. You must understand that there are certain issues that are causing him to act the way he does around you. Speak from a place of empathy. However, do let him know about your expectations in your marriage and how he should behave.
Try your best to validate his feelings. This could make him feel understood and make him lower his defenses.
In a marriage, both spouses should practice a certain level of tolerance towards each other. But when your husband thinks he does nothing wrong, you need to set your boundaries.
For example, let him know that you won’t engage in a conversation with him unless he is willing to hear your side of things rather than insisting that he is always right. He needs to understand that two-way communication is the secret to a thriving marriage. Set your boundaries and be firm with them.
As mentioned above, you need to speak from a place of empathy when communicating with your husband. Make him feel that you understand what he is dealing with. If you insist on being right while he thinks he does nothing wrong, you will only end up in a heated argument and nothing good can come out of your conversation.
Give him the chance to speak and explain why he feels he is right. Once you hear his side of the story, share your side. This will give you both a chance to see things from both perspectives.
See a Counselor
If you have no success with trying to maintain communication in your marriage, it might be time to seek professional help through a marriage counselor. They will serve as a neutral party that will moderate your communication as a husband and wife.
A counselor can help identify underlying issues in your marriage and recommend solutions for them. There are several research studies that support how counseling can improve communication and conflict resolution in a marriage. If you are having trouble communicating with each other, this can be a viable solution.
Have an Exit Plan
Yes. This might be a bitter pill to swallow, but you have to be honest with yourself. If you are not happy with how your husband is treating you, especially when he thinks he does nothing wrong, then you may have no other recourse but to leave the relationship. Do this only when you have tried every possible solution you can think of.
The unfortunate reality is that when this is personality-based, it is difficult to address because your husband is not open to the idea of changing. When your husband won’t admit to his fault and constantly shows a lack of respect towards you, then it’s probably not worth saving your marriage. You should not be asking for respect in a marriage – that is not how it works.