Caught in a Lovetrap? Clearing Up Blind Spots in Your Marriage or Love Relationship
What Are “Lovetraps,” and How Can They Get You Stuck in Your Marriage or Love Relationship? Have you ever interpreted something your partner or spouse did in a negative way, only later to find out you were either blowing things out of proportion, or simply wrong? If you’re like most humans, that is easy to […]
How Your Brain Protects You and Can Hurt You in Your Marriage or Love Relationship
In your marriage or love relationship, your mind wants to protect you from the possibility of abandonment, hurt, or betrayal that you may have experienced from a prior significant relationship. However, your brain is much more likely to keep you alive if it overestimates the links or associations between what is going on in your […]
Why Does Not Loading the Dishwasher Turn into Such a Big Fight?
As humans, we all have raw spots, or areas of sensitivity, that come from our temperament and our life experiences. In adult love relationships, your personal history with key caregivers, usually your parents and past romantic relationships, influences how you perceive situations with your partner or spouse now, especially when your partner or spouse does […]
How to Make Love Last: the 3-R’s of the Loving at Your Best Plan
At the Loving at Your Best Plan in NYC, we use the “3-R’s” to increase the security in your marriage or relationship. The 3-R process is: 1. Regulate your central nervous system to maintain your ability to adequately see yourself and your partner or spouse 2. Reflect on what is happening with yourself and your partner […]
2 Ways to Break Up Your Marriage or Love Relationship
How do you know if your marriage or relationship is headed off-course? When you don’t see or understand your needs for connecting in your marriage or love relationship, and don’t know how to connect on a deeper level, your reaction most likely fits into one of two categories: 1. Turning away from your partner or […]
4 Key Questions to Ask in Your Marriage or Love Relationship
A whole new science of love and connection has developed over the last two decades that helps 7 out of 10 distressed marriages or couples significantly repair their relationship, known as Emotionally Focused Therapy for couples, developed by Sue Johnson, author of “Hold Me Tight.” Love doesn’t have to be a mystery anymore, and is […]
Am I Too Needy? The Anxious Partner in a Marriage or Relationship
Does your husband, wife, or partner accuse you of being “needy” in your marriage or love relationship? Do you sometimes feel overwhelmed by anxiety or anger when your partner or spouse doesn’t respond to you the way you’d like, or isn’t available? Are you sometimes confused by wanting to be closer with your partner or […]
The Day After Tragedy, Let Us Remember Kindness
Before you know what kindness really is you must lose things, feel the future dissolve in a moment like salt in a weakened broth. What you held in your hand, what you counted and carefully saved, all this must go so you know how desolate the landscape can be between the regions of kindness. How […]
Does Couples Counseling Work? A Key Tool
A key tool to help couples counseling work actually lies in how both a partner or spouse in a marriage or relationship tell the stories of who they are and what they’ve experienced in their lives. How do you understand what happens to you in your own life? Most likely, you tell stories to give […]
How Do You Tell Your Story in Your Marriage or Relationship?
Did you know that how you tell your personal stories in your life reveals how you connect and attach in your significant relationships, especially in your marriage or love relationship? You organize the experiences in your life through a voice that narrates a story inside your brain. The people closest to you in your life […]
